Out of work? 5 Things Your Partner Needs to Know

If you have ever been laid off, it can be a life-altering experience.  We all choose how to react to the sudden change -whether it's expected or not.  But either way, you need to get into the 'job hunt' groove or you seriously risk your ability to quickly find that next great opportunity.  Otherwise, you could be sucked into habits of 'helping out' that often plague relationships for out-of-work partners.  So, please find your partner/wife/common-law better half.  N o w.  Yes, grab their hand - and sit them down in front of your reading device.  They're here? Ok, I need to talk to them. 

Hi there.  If you're reading this, it's because your better half or partner has grabbed you to show you some important information that will help them find that next great job. For you, it's probably filled with a lot of unknowns - how will you make ends meet, what do to next.  Trust me, having been in your shoes a couple of times in my life, there are five simple rules we all need to follow to help your partner find their next opportunity.  Failure to adhere to these rules put his or her chances of finding work quickly in jeopardy.

1. Now is not the time to catch up on household work, fix outstanding items, or do any renovations that you've wished to do.  Why?  It's not their job.  Their job and focus needs to be finding new work.  Your partner needs to be out there - meeting work friends, networking lunches and coffees, and generally getting his/her name out there that they are looking for work.
2. Be supportive.  If you start pointing fingers that this is their fault, best be holding up the mirror and look at yourself and ask - how would I want to be treated if it was me?  Right now, your partner needs your patience and support to help them find a new job.  Loosing a job can have a serious impact on your partners morale.  If you start to feel resentful about their situation, ask yourself - are you truly being a life partner or a parasite? But if you're on board and supportive, it helps them maintain life balance. And remember, looking for work should take 6-8 hours a day. (But take the weekends off!)
3. Ensure they keep their regular schedule they had before the job loss.  If your partner used to get up at 6am, work out, then go to work, then make sure you kick their butt out of bed and hit that gym, or walk, or yoga class. Routine is the best medicine to help maintain mental health (ego, esteem, and energy).  Were you planing an inexpensive trip? GO! Routine, routine, routine!
4. Let EVERYONE know.  And I mean everyone. No secrets. Last thing you want to do is show up at a family function and Uncle Bob finds out the hard way - "Hey Alice - did you get that bonus you were hoping for?"  "Umm, sorry Uncle Bob, I got laid off last month".  Facebook it, tweet it, and share the info.  Job opportunities often come not from your direct contacts, but often through third parties of your friends.  The more that people know you're looking for work, the more ears that are listening for opportunities.
5. DON'T PANIC - Help them pick the 'right' job.  I was once unemployed and I panicked, picking the first opportunity that came by.  Not only did I pick a job that was worse than the one that I just left, but the environment was employee-toxic with horrible management practices and low corporate morale. Make sure they don't just take the first offer.  And now that you have a little time - research the company doing the offer.  Ask friends - is it a good place to work at? Why did the last person leave the job? What's the turn-over rate like? Is it a good work-life balance? Future career opportunities?

It's important for you, as the person who is on the other side of this relationship, to know that your partner right now needs your patience and support.  They may be moody, but adding fuel to the fire will turn your current situation from uncertain to critical.  And make sure they keep their routine.  No sleeping in. Get them up and out of bed every morning! The less hours they spend at home networking, the better.

Besides, this is a great opportunity to turn a bad job into a great career with a new company.  If you give them the support they need right now, the faster and easier this transition can be!